“Fear of a name only increases fear of the thing itself.”

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

Harry and his friends are back for another year at Hogwarts. Our main cast is still young and are joined by Mark Williams (he’s Rory Willaims’ father in Doctor Who, made other appearances in BBC shows, as well as Billy in Stardust, Wabash in Shakespeare in Love, and Horace in the live action 101 Dalmatians) as Mr. Arthur Weasley, Jason Isaacs (he voiced the Inquisitor in Star Wars Rebels and Zhao in Avatar: The Last Airbender) as Mr. Lucius Malfoy, and the voice of Toby Jones (most recently he was Basil Shaw in Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny, Arnim Zola in the MCU, and voiced Owl in Christopher Robin. He was Culverton Smith in an episode of Sherlock, appeared in the Hunger Games movies, Doctor Who, Amazing Grace, and Snow White and the Huntsman, as well as the royal page in Ever After) as Dobby. Kenneth Branagh (he is now Hercule Poirot in the recent Agatha Christie movies [which he also directed]: A Haunting in Venice, Death on the Nile, and Murder on the Orient Express. He was Cherevin in Jack Ryan: Shadow Recruit with Chris Pine [he also directed], and is very famous for his acting and directing work in productions of Shakespeare, notably Hamlet and Henry V. We’ve also noted he’s directed the live action Cinderella film and the first Thor film of the MCU) is Gilderoy Lockhart and Miriam Margoyles (she was in an episode of Merlin, and was the voice of the Matchmaker in Disney’s animated Mulan, as well as the grandmother in Balto) is Professor Sprout.

A trend we will see throughout the series is that Harry starts each new adventure back at the Dursleys for summer break, missing Hogwarts. This year, so far he has not heard from any of his friends; his school things are locked away. The Dursleys are preparing for a dinner party and Harry is to “be in my bedroom, making no noise, pretending I’m not there (pg. 6).” Except, he has an unexpected guest in his bedroom, a creature he finds out is a house-elf, named Dobby, who warns Harry not to return to Hogwarts, there is a “plat to make most terrible things happen (pg. 16).” Harry insists he will return to the magic school. It comes out that Dobby has been stopping his mail and he won’t return the letters until Harry promises he won’t go back. The house-elf takes off running and floats dessert over the guests’ heads, getting Harry in trouble, both with the Ministry of Magic and the Dursleys; “Dobby must do it, for Harry Potter’s own good.” Vernon takes great delight in putting bars on the window of Harry’s room, ranting he’ll never go back to school or see his friends again.

Harry is luckily rescued by Ron, Fred, and George Weasley in their father’s flying car and we all get to witness our first magical home, where the dishes wash themselves and knitting needles turn out work by themselves. Molly is furious with her son, “beds empty, no note, car gone!” but pleased to see Harry. We meet Arthur Weasley when he returns home from work at the Ministry, the Office of the Misuse of Muggle Artifacts; he only berates his sons when his wife glares at him. He turns to Harry and eagerly asks “what is the function of a rubber duck?” Dumbledore even sends Harry’s school list to the Burrow. Harry accompanies the Weasley family to Diagon Alley for school supplies. He’s introduced to Floo Powder as a method of travel; he ends up in Knockturn Alley and luckily Hagrid shows up to lead him where he wants to go. He, the Weasleys, and Hermione run into Draco Malfoy and his father, Lucius, in the bookstore, where they also meet their new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, Gilderoy Lockhart. There’s a scuffle between Lucius and Arthur, then Harry spends the rest of the summer at the Burrow, referring to it as the happiest in his life.

They take Arthur’s car to the train station, but are running late, so Ron and Harry will be the last through. Except, when they try to get on to the platform, the barrier is sealed. They reason they’ll wait by the car, then Ron suggests they fly the car to Hogwarts. There’s an Invisibility Booster, so they shouldn’t be seen, but it malfunctions. The film shows a more exciting ride, though the big finish is landing on the Whomping Willow at the school and the car getting pummeled. It ejects the two boys and their things, then drives off into the Forbidden Forest. Snape gets ahold of them first and informs them they were seen, and put the whole Magical World at risk of being discovered. If it was up to him, they’d both be on the train home that evening. However, their fate lies with Professor McGonagall. They won’t be expelled, yet, but their actions were very serious, so they will both serve detention.

Their first lesson as second years is Herbology, where they repot Mandrakes, which look like babies in the roots, and they scream very loudly. Neville faints at the sound. Harry also meets an eager first year, Colin Creevy, who is fascinated with Wizarding photographs and wants some of Harry. Which leads to Lockhart finding out and attempting to give Harry advice about fame; Harry would rather run away. Lockhart introduces his class: “be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizard kind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm (pg. 101).” Then he sets loose Cornish Pixies and is ineffective and capturing them again, leaving Harry, Ron, and Hermione to finish the job.

Harry runs into Draco again on the way to Quidditch practice and finds out that Draco is the new Seeker for Slytherin, and his father donated new brooms to the team. Hermione remarks that all the players on Gryffindor got in on pure talent; no one had to buy their way onto the team. Draco retorts the no one asked for the opinion of a filthy Mudblood. Ron tries to stand up for Hermione and tells Draco to eat slugs, but his wand was damaged by the Willow and the spell backfires on Ron, causing him to belch up slugs. Harry is informed what a Mudblood means (dirty blood, magical child of Muggle parentage), then has to spend his detention with Lockhart.

As the hours wain on, he hears a strange voice. But Lockhart doesn’t. Harry hears it again as he heads to the common room and follows it to discover a pool of water and Mrs. Norris hanging on the wall with the ominous phrase “The Chamber of Secrets has been opened. Enemies of the Heir, beware” on the wall. (In the book, this is preceded by Nearly Headless Nick’s Deathday party, but that was omitted in the film). Harry is discovered at the scene, and Filch wants to condemn him, but Snape actually points out that Harry might just be in the wrong place at the wrong time. However, what brought him there? Harry does not admit that he heard a strange voice (Snape instead tries to get Harry off the Quidditch team in the book, but McGonagall sees through that).

Hermione speaks up in class (Transfiguration with McGonagall in the film, History of Magic with Professor Binns in the book) to ask about the Chamber of Secrets. The students learn a little more about the Founding of Hogwarts by Rowena Ravenclaw, Helga Hufflepuff, Salazar Slytherin, and Godric Gryffindor. Slytherin wanted to be more selective on who was taught at school, keeping it to pureblood families. The rest of the Founders disagreed and so legend states that Slytherin built a secret chamber and housed a monster that could rid the school of non-pureblood students. (Mrs. Norris’ owner, Argus Filch, is shown to be a Squib, a non-magical child of magical parents). The trio of course decide to investigate and reason that Malfoy is the Heir of Slytherin, with his family history in Slytherin and stance on purebloods. Hermione figures the best way to question him would be to use Polyjuice Potion, so they could transform into other Slytherin students and find out. The film doesn’t show that they have to get Most Potente Potions from the Restricted Section; they trick Lockhart into signing a permission form (Hermione is one of the students who is in awe of Lockhart).

Harry faces Draco on the Quidditch field first, Wood telling him “get to that Snitch before Malfoy, or die trying (pg. 167).” Well, during the game, a Bludger goes rogue and only follows Harry. Draco calls out “training for the ballet, Potter?” while Harry tries to dodge the heavy ball. Then it’s a race between the two of them to catch the Snitch. The Bludger finds it mark and breaks Harry’s arm, but he manages to catch the Snith. Then Lockhart runs over to help Harry and instead of mending his broken bones, makes them disappear. Harry ends up in the Hospital Wing to regrow his bones. Dobby the house-elf appears again and Harry finds out it was the elf who stopped the barrier and set the Bludger to attack him. We do manage to feel bad alongside Harry when we find out how Dobby is treated, but their conversation is cut short by teachers arriving with a frozen Colin Creevey. Dumbledore is sure now that the Chamber is indeed open. But the question is who, not how. In the film, he admits to McGonagall that the students are in danger and Hogwarts is no longer safe. [But he doesn’t send them home yet.]

So, the Headmaster allows Lockhart to start a Dueling Club for the school and Snape somehow becomes Lockhart opponent [how did that happen? Did he volunteer? Was he asked? By whom?]. The opponents trade salutes like in a saber duel and Snape manages to teach the students a useful spell: Expelliarmus, and make a fool of Lockhart at the same time. Lockhart nominates Harry as the next student and Snape brings up Draco Malfoy. “Scared, Potter?” “You wish.” They attempt more than disarming and Draco fires a snake at Harry. But before the professors can banish it, Harry speaks to it and orders it away from another student. However, everyone is in shock and a little afraid (look at Snape’s expression in the movie; he was certainly not expecting that and probably brings up a whole host of questions). Ron questions Harry about the ability and reveals that Harry can speak another language: Parsletongue. It was an ability Slytherin himself prized. So now everyone is going to think Harry is the Heir of Slytherin, and many students do. The Weasley twins try to make a joke of it, but it wears on Harry. And as Hermione points out, Harry doesn’t know that much about his family in order to dispute it. Then, another student is attacked, through Nearly Headless Nick. Dumbledore finally asks Harry if there is anything he’d like to share with the older wizard. Harry keeps quiet, especially after questioning the Sorting Hat and finding out the Hat still thinks Slytherin would have been a good fit. He also meets Dumbledore’s phoenix, Fawkes, in the Headmaster’s office. [I notice a similarity between Fawkes’ theme and the love theme from Attack of the Clones, both written by John Williams and both films came out in 2002. That is also why a lot of the themes from the first film were reused in this film.]

There are some deleted scenes from the film that show the other students; mainly Hufflepuff, discuss Harry as the Heir of Slytherin. One surmises that maybe Voldemort went to kill Harry because he didn’t want another Dark Wizard competing against him. There’s also a beautiful scenic shot of Harry and Hedwig, sitting away from the castle and looking back at it. Harry asks his companion, “who am I, Hedwig? What am I?”

The Polyjuice Potion is ready at Christmas; Ron and Harry manage to transform into Crabbe and Goyle, but Hermione can’t join them. They find their way to Slytherin’s Common Room and talk to Draco. Luckily, Crabbe and Goyle are already a little dim, so Draco readily tells them again, he doesn’t know who the Heir is; his father won’t tell him. But the last time, someone died. Ron and Harry report back to Hermione and find out that the hair she used was cat hair. She goes to the Hospital Wing to get transformed back. Harry also finds a book thrown through Myrtle; when he examines it, it’s blank, but it belonged to a T.M. Riddle. Ron recognizes the name from an award he had to polish, from fifty years ago. They had discovered the last Chamber of Secrets attacks were fifty years ago. Harry examines the diary further and attempts writing in it: it writes back. Tom shows Harry his memory of catching the culprit; Hagrid. But Harry refuses to believe Hagrid is truly at fault. Before he can get more information, his room is trashed and the diary is gone.

Harry hears the voices again on the way to a Quidditch match and Hermione heads to the library; “because that’s what Hermione does, when in doubt, go to the library (pg. 255).” The match is canceled and McGonagall informs Ron and Harry that it was Hermione and another girl who were attacked, holding a mirror. New rules are set in place and everyone is under a curfew. Harry drags his dad’s Invisibility Cloak out again and he and Ron sneak down to Hagrid’s. But they’re not the only ones to show up. Dumbledore and Cornelius Fudge, the Minister of Magic show up to arrest Hagrid, even though Dumbledore vouches for him. Then Lucius Malfoy shows up with a letter from the school governors to suspend Dumbledore. Fudge even protests, but Dumbledore goes peacefully and says in parting “I will only truly have left this school when none here are loyal to me. You will also find that help will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it (pg. 264).” Hagrid drops the loud hint that answers lie with following the spiders.

Ron’s not keen on following the spiders into the Forbidden Forest. And they run into a test of huge spiders [I refuse to watch the scenes in the movie; they creep me out]. But they find out, while this was the pet Hagrid kept in the school, it is not the monster from the Chamber. Hagrid was innocent. They still try to eat Harry and Ron, luckily, the old car comes to their rescue and drives them out of the forest. The two boys also deduce, that if the girl who died was found in the bathroom, it may be Moaning Myrtle. Their next clue comes from a piece of paper grasped in Hermione’s hand, a page detailing a basilisk; the King of Serpents “of the many fearsome beasts and monsters that roam our land, there is none more curious or more deadly (pg. 290).” Spiders flee from it and the cry of a rooster is fatal, which is why Hagrid has been finding the roosters dead. Hermione also wrote “pipes” on the page. Harry figures it out; it’s a snake, so that’s why only he is hearing it. It’s slithering through the pipes in the school and no one has died from its gaze because they only saw reflections.

Before they can act on their knowledge, the school goes into lockdown. They hide in the teachers’ lounge and discover that Ginny Weasley was taken into the Chamber. The other professors dispense with Lockhart, claiming he can use his experience he’s written about to rescue the girl (of course, not believing anything of the sort). Ron and Harry still go to him with their information and find him packing. They force him to Myrtle’s bathroom, where Harry asks about how she died. One of the sinks has a carved snake on the faucet and Harry uses Parsletongue to open the Chamber of Secrets. The boys force Lockhart down. The man faints at the sight of a snake skin, then tries to wipe their memories. That’s his actual expertise; he wrote about what other people did and took the credit, but wiped their memories so they couldn’t blab, all so he could become famous. And he’ll do the same again. Except, he took Ron’s wand and the spell backfires and also causes a cave in. Harry goes on alone.

He finds an unconscious Ginny and a very solid looking Tom Riddle, out of the diary. He reveals that Ginny had been writing in the diary all year, pouring her soul out to an invisible stranger. Which is exactly what he wanted; he has grown stronger while Ginny has grown weaker and soon, he’ll be alive again and Ginny will be dead. He also very much wants to talk to Harry; “how is it that you – a skinny boy with no extraordinary magical talent – manage to defeat the greatest wizard of all time (pg. 313)?” Harry wants to know why Tom is interested in Voldemort, he’s after his time. Voldemort is Tom’s past, present, and future. The letters in Tom Marvolo Riddle rearranged create I am Lord Voldemort. Tom refused to keep the name of his filthy Muggle father, when the blood of Salazar Slytherin runs in his veins. Dumbledore suspected him in school, so he locked his memories away in the dairy so someone later could finish his work. Harry corrects Tom that Dumbledore is the greatest wizard of all time. A strange tune comes to them and Fawkes appears, bringing the Sorting Hat. Tom is prepared to kill Harry, though notes there are similarities between them; both half-blood, both orphans, both Parslemouths, and they even look a bit alike. Still, Harry has to die. He calls forth the basilisk. Harry goes running, but Fawkes attacks the serpent, blinding it, which allows Harry to now see where the snake is. He begs the Hat for help, and pulls out a sword. When the basilisk strikes, Harry stabs it through it’s mouth, but he gets a fang in the arm. Before Harry can succumb to the wound, Fawkes sheds a few tears. Phoenix tears have healing properties. Harry decides to stab the diary with the fang in order to stop Tom. The memory disappears and Ginny wakes. Harry gets everyone together and Fawkes flies them out to McGonagall’s office.

Arthur and Molly Weasley are waiting for Ginny. Arthur tells her off; she should know better than to “trust anything that can think for itself if you can’t see where it keeps its brain (pg. 329)” [and that is Arthur Weasley’s best line]. Dumbledore insists that Ginny will face no punishment; older and wiser wizards have been hoodwinked by Voldemort. Ron is sent with a letter to get Hagrid back. Dumbledore also explains that Tom Riddle disappeared after school and travelled far and wide. He “sank so deeply into the Dark Arts, consorted with the very worst of our kind, that when he resurfaced as Lord Voldemort, he was barely recognizable. Hardly anyone connected Lord Voldemort with the clever, handsome boy (pg. 329).” Dumbledore thanks Harry for the loyalty he showed the Headmaster; that was why Fawkes came. Harry brings up the similarities Tom pointed out between the two boys. Dumbledore admits that there are similarities, but it is their choices that “show what we truly are, far more than abilities (pg. 333).” Also, Voldemort managed to transfer some of his powers to Harry the night he attempted to kill him. Though only a true Gryffindor could have pulled Godric Gryffindor’s sword from the Sorting Hat.

Lucius Malfoy shows up, with Dobby in tow, demanding why Dumbledore returned. The older wizard explains that the other governors wrote to him, asking him back, when they found out Arthur Weasley’s daughter was taken. Seems Lucius threatened to curse their families if they didn’t dismiss Dumbledore in the first place. Harry figures out that Lucius slipped Ginny the diary the day they ran into each other in Flourish and Blotts. Harry can’t prove it and Lucius warns him he’ll meet the same sticky end as his parents. “Let us hope Mr. Potter will always be around to save the day.” “Don’t worry, I will be.” He runs after Lucius to return the diary and when the man tosses the disgusting book to Dobby, he doesn’t realize it has one of Harry’s socks in it. He’s presented Dobby with clothes; Dobby is free! Lucius tries to attack Harry [possibly starting the Killing Curse], pulling his wand from his cane (like nobles used to with their swords…totally cool!) but Dobby protects Harry Potter. Harry is grateful, but asks the elf to never try to save his life again.

Everyone who was Petrified is revived. Hermione rushes to give Harry a hug, then awkwardly shakes hands with Ron. School exams are cancelled as a treat. And Hagrid returns to Hogwarts, stopping to thank the trio. Harry stands and tells the man, “there’s no Hogwarts without you, Hagrid.” [And I shed a tear watching this, remembering that Robbie Coltrane is no longer with us.] He hugs the man and Dumbledore is the next to stand and begins clapping [and that actor is no longer with us, either; he passed away before the film premiered]. McGonagall is the next to join in and soon most of the Great Hall is applauding Hagrid (accompanied with the sweeping theme from the ending of the first film).

Next Time: Prisoner of Azkaban

“You’re late.” “And you’re missing an eye.”

Thor: Ragnarök

The third solo Thor film; the title is part of actual Norse mythology, though Marvel has it occur a bit different than what tradition has passed down. There is a new villain in Hela (played by Cate Blanchett; Galadriel in Lord of the Rings and Hobbit, as well as the voice of Valka in the latter two How to Train Your Dragon movies. She’s the stepmother in Kenneth Branagh’s Cinderella, involved in Ocean’s Eight, played Elizabeth I twice, and Marion in Ridley Scott’s Robin Hood). Jeff Goldblum is another antagonist in the Grandmaster, and Karl Urban is Skurge (Éomer in Lord of the Rings, Dr. McCoy in the alternate universe Star Trek movies, and apparently a stormtrooper in Rise of Skywalker.) [We’ll cover more on the fact that Marvel has chosen a lot of Middle Earth actors to be in their universe in the wrap-up post.]

This film starts a little differently, with Thor voicing over a summary, saying he’s saved Earth a couple times and is now a hero. And he’s been searching the cosmos for the Infinity Stones. And that is how he ended up in a cage, from which he drops and dangles and spins in front of Surtur, who is destined to destroy Asgard in Ragnarök. Thor has been concerned about Ragnarök, with the nature of his dreams lately; so if he takes the crown off Surtur’s head, it can never be put in the Eternal Flame and thus Ragnarök will be averted. But Surtur warns Thor that Ragnarök has already begun and Odin is not on Asgard. There is nothing Thor can do to stop it. He still holds his hand out for Mjölnir and smashes through the demons (cue Immigrant Song). He calls for Heimdall after he takes the crown off Surtur, but he doesn’t get a response, so he has to dodge a dragon (of some sort [could be a reference to the Midgard serpent of Norse legend]). Turns out, Heimdall is not at the Bifrost, there’s a new guy, Skurge, who is too busy showing off to ladies to hear Thor. He does eventually answer, after Thor slays the dragon. Heimdall is a fugitive, after being declared a traitor to the crown. Thor flies off to confront “Odin,” and Skurge runs behind him.

There’s a new statue of Loki and Thor discovers a play being performed about Loki’s sacrifice (with Luke Hemsworth [Chris’s older brother; a cousin of theirs is a college girl in the film] portraying Thor, Matt Damon portraying Loki, and Sam Neill portraying Odin). When Thor addresses “Odin,” he remarks “Oh shit,” then babbles that the Asgardians wanted to honor Loki. Thor then holds on to Odin, swinging Mjölnir, then threatens that nothing with stop the hammer from returning to his hand, “not even your face, brother.” “Odin” shouts he yields and transforms into Loki [we already knew Odin was Loki from the last scene of Dark World]. Skurge finally shows up, but Loki’s already annoyed; his new lackey had one job, and didn’t do it well.

Thor now demands to know where Odin is. Loki knows. He’s on Earth. At the Shady Acre Senior Home…that is currently being demolished when the brothers visit. Loki doesn’t know where Odin currently is, making a crack that he’s not a witch. Then Loki disappears and Thor finds a card, directing him to Bleeker St; where Thor meets Dr. Stephen Strange; “Earth has wizards now?” Strange keeps an eye on threats to Earth, including Loki, but all Thor and Loki want is to find Odin. Strange can help with that (and also show off his magic to Thor [there’s an interesting post on the different ways Loki and Strange utilize magic, being pro-Loki]), and opens a portal for Thor. He needs his “umbrella” first, which crashes into several things on its way to Thor, and Loki. Who has been “falling for thirty minutes!” Strange sends the brothers to Norway.

Odin is sitting calmly, waiting for his sons. It admittedly took time for his to shake off Loki’s magic, but now, Odin misses his wife. He knows his time draws near, and he has to warn Thor and Loki that they have a sister, whom he exiled for her violent appetite. She is the goddess of death, and Odin’s first born. She draws her power from Asgard and if she resides there, it will be limitless. He also counsels his sons to remember this place they all saw each other. Then he turns to gold dust and floats away.

A storm begins brewing and Thor and Loki are ready to fight again, until Hela emerges. Their clothes transform when they approach her. She first tells them to kneel. To which Loki demands, “I beg your pardon?” [How dare she steal his line.] Thor throws Mjölnir, which Hela crushes. The brothers try to make it to Asgard, but Hela attacks them while in transit and throws them out. When Hela arrives at the Bifrost, she instantly stabs Volstagg and Fandral for moving against her. Skurge just wants to survive, so she takes him with her.

Thor lands on Sakaar, in a rubbish heap. A crew try to take him prisoner, but another woman comes along and claims him instead, with a little shocking device (she’s also a little drunk). Thor meets the Grandmaster and hears about his contest of champions. If Thor wants his freedom, he has to defeat the Grandmaster’s contender. Loki is also in the background and the brothers bicker a little; Loki was thrown out first and landed before Thor, but managed to befriend the Grandmaster instead of be trapped. Loki later visits his brother in the prison, while Thor holds a quiet, private memorial for Odin, which Loki joins. Though it’s just an illusion; Thor can easily throw rocks through Loki lied to both of them. Yet, when Thor argues he wants to return to Asgard, Loki insists that Hela is stronger. They could wait a while, and make their own way off Sakaar and go anywhere. Thor finally reviews Loki’s actions; he faked his death, stripped Odin of his powers and stole the throne, left Odin on Earth, to die, which released the goddess of death. And that is only the past two days. Loki warns his brother that anyone who faces the Grandmaster’s contender perishes; and he’s bet heavily against Thor.

[Let’s stop and consider a few things for a moment, since Loki is one of my favorite characters: He joined in the memorial for Odin; he still considers Odin to be his father, as much as he sneeringly denies it at times. He is genuinely concerned for his brother going against Hela. He claims Hela as “our sister.” His voice rises when he tells Thor he doesn’t stand a chance. So, as much as Loki argues to the contrary; he’s still Thor’s brother, he’s still Odin’s son. And, as Hela pointed out, Loki picked up some of Odin’s mannerism, offering to come to a deal. And supposedly, the Asgardians didn’t notice a difference in Loki ruling as Odin.]

Meanwhile, in Asgard, Hela greets the guards and claims her right to rule as Odin’s firstborn. The guards attack and she has fun slaying them all; Hogun being the last one standing. While Hela and Skurge are busy outside the palace, Heimdall steals his sword from Bifrost (preventing Hela from rampaging the cosmos). Inside the palace, Hela reveals that Odin covered up the history he had with Hela; how they won the Nine Realms by spilling buckets of blood. But when Hela grew too ambitious, Odin locked her away. Below the palace, the dead guards are buried and she uses the Eternal Flame to revive them, along with the gigantic wolf, Fenris [who does play a part in the traditional Ragnarök myth].

Thor is sent to face the Grandmaster’s contender and Korg, his rock buddy in prison, points out that the woman who caught Thor is an Asgardian. Thor recognizes her as a Valkyrie, due to a tattoo, and tries to ask for her help. She dismisses him. Thor then has to face a haircut from Stan Lee, and enters the ring. Turns out, the champion is Hulk. Thor is ecstatic; “he’s a friend from work.” Loki is decidedly not. But Thor cannot reason with the Banner portion, he cannot use tricks to calm him down. So they pummel each other, Hulk even smashing Thor like he did Loki in New York, which Loki gleefully shouts “that’s how it feels!” [and the funniest part of the movie]. This triggers lightning to come out of Thor and the ante is upped. And just when Thor is ready to finish Hulk, the Grandmaster shocks Thor and he passes out.

But he wakes up in Hulk’s chambers (briefly shirtless, I think that’s a rule) and tries to pick up their friendship. He realizes that Hulk came to Sakaar in the Quinjet and that is a way off. But Hulk wants to stay. Thor manages to contact Heimdall and check on the situation in Asgard. The people hide from Hela. Heimdall suggests Thor go through the big doorway to get off the planet. Hulk is friends with Valkyrie and Thor attempts to recruit her, but Valkyrie wants nothing to do with Hela. She’s happy to drink and forget. Thor manages to get out and to the Quinjet, but the Hulk destroys it when he wants Thor to stay. Triggering a video from Black Widow brings Banner back, who is concerned he stayed as the Hulk for two years. If that happens again, Banner may not come back.

The Grandmaster sends Loki and Valkyrie to find Thor and Hulk, though after a brief fight, in which Loki also discovers who Valkyrie is, they team up with Thor and Banner to get off Sakaar, through the largest portal. Loki can help them get a ship. Thor and Loki fight together, and Loki suggests he goes separate ways from Thor. And Thor agrees; at one point, he thought the world of Loki, but Loki keeps betraying him, and their paths diverged long ago. He still suggests they do “get help.” Loki does not want to do “get help.” They do “get help” and Thor throws Loki at the guards. Loki attempts to betray Thor, but Thor is a step ahead this time, and slaps a shocker on Loki. Korg and his revolution eventually free Loki, who takes a larger transport to follow Thor. Thor steals one of the Grandmaster’s ships and Valkyrie helps clear their path off planet.

Hela and Skurge are threatening the people, who are trying to make it to the Bifrost with Heimdall, but an army is behind them and Fenris is in front of them. Thor sits on the throne to draw Hela to him. He even tries to bond with Hela, that Odin’s solutions to problem was to either cover it up, or cast it out. But Thor is wise enough to know he cannot trust Hela; he’d love for someone else to take the thrown, but she’s just the worst. In the ensuing fight, Hela slices out one of Thor’s eyes, so now he looks like Odin.

Meanwhile, Valkyrie starts to clear a path for the Asgardians. Bruce turns into the Hulk and takes on Fenris (after smooshing into the rainbow bridge as Bruce first). A transport ship arrives for the people, Loki proudly declaring “your savior is here!” Heimdall knew Loki would show up, and Loki joins him against the army.

Thor is losing the fight against Hela and she taunts him, “what were you the god of again?” Thor has a vision of Odin, who counsels him that Mjölnir was only a way for Thor to focus and control his power. And Asgard is the people, not a place. Thor fears he is not as strong as Odin; not, Odin tells him, Thor is stronger. This triggers lightning from Thor again and he blasts his sister (notice the pride on Loki’s face), and a repeat of the Immigrant Song. And a totally epic image of Thor smashing through the ranks with lightning. The heroes still struggle and Hela tries to stop the transport ship. Skurge jumps out from where he was hiding to take on the army, but Hela spears him.

Thor realizes the only way they can defeat Hela is to destroy Asgard; she’ll lose her power. They have to trigger Ragnarök. He sends Loki (whom he knew would show up) to the vault to put Surtur’s crown in the Eternal Flame. The devil-like creature is happy to smash, though Hulk tries to take him on and Thor has to call him back. Hela rallies for a moment, but Surtur still smashes her. Sadly, the planet is destroyed, but the people survive. And Loki is there to stand beside his brother (and we hope they did hug). Loki is not sure about returning to Earth, but Thor feels everything will work out fine. There is an ominously huge ship that appears in front of them.

I find this film funnier than several of the other Marvel movies. It’s an appropriate amount of humor; Love and Thunder just tried too hard. Thor is more off the cuff and even Loki is more relaxed. We continue to see more of a sibling relationship between Thor and Loki, like throwing things at each other, anticipating each other’s moves. And playing Led Zepplin’s Immigrant Song makes it badass; and the lyrics match well, as my father pointed out: “We come from the land of ice and snow/From the midnight sun where the hot springs flow/The hammer of the god/Will drive our ships to new lands/To fight the horde, sing and cry/Valhalla, I am coming.”

We also witness two kickass female characters…with absolutely no love interests! Hela reveals in being the goddess of death [Cate Blanchett is plain awesome]. Valkyrie doesn’t take crap from anyone.

I’ve recently started my research on Norse mythology, with a course from Wondrium, that covered the basics of their legends and clearly stated that Marvel got the legend wrong. It was fairly interesting, though I intend to follow up with some books I already own (including the tome by Neil Gaiman).

At the time of writing this blog, sadly Ray Stevenson, the actor who portrays Volstagg [among other roles, such as Porthos in the 2011 Three Musketeers] passed away on May 21^st.

I am incredibly busy for the next month, so Black Panther will be a while coming (but it will come). In the meantime, who are your favorite MCU characters?